First off, a huge thank you to user DalianAtkinsonsUmbrella for giving me an excuse to not write about Aston Villa this week. DAU, as he or she shall now be known as for the rest of this article, got in touch with us last month with a fantastic idea - since the real Villa are so devastatingly awful this year, why not focus our creative effort on something not so real: the 7500toHolte Fantasy League!
So let's start with the basics. 24 weeks in, team "Slash" is on top of the table, with 1,376 points. Slash has got Jamie Vardy and Riyad Mahrez, a duo who I'm expecting to be in basically every single one of the 313 teams in our league. He also has no Villa players, because why would anyone have a Villa player in their fantasy squad? Just below Slash is "Lads on Toure" with 1,364. I'd say the top 20 or so in the league are within 60 points of the leader, so it's far from over. I also want to point out that DAU, and his team "Gangs of DwightYorke", sit in a highly respectable 41st place, with 1,271 points.
Ohhhhh, just below is our first 7500 writer, who just happens to be our site leader, editor, dictator, etc. Robert Lintott, which seems a little suspicious to me. I'm not saying he fudged the numbers somehow, but I'm not not saying it, you know? He's in 47th, with 1,263, and what's this? No Villa players in his squad? For shame, Robert. For shame.
Some names? This is all subjective, of course but here are some of my favorites: Expected Toulouse, Dynamo Chicken Kiev, Baines on Toast, TEAM NAME 2 (a classic), We'll Be Fine (hysterical), and Neville Wears Prada. Let me know the best ones I missed down in the comments, too.
By the way, Villa's highest point getter this season is... Joleon Lescott? 55 points? Don't ask me how. Ayew and Gestede both have 54. Let's take a look at ownership percentages. Brad Guzan is the most owned Villa player, at 4.3%, and I'm assuming that 99% of teams have him simply because he's a cheap reserve keeper. I'd name the lowest owned player, but there's so, so many Villa players at 0.0% that it's not even worth it. Good for Lewis Kinsella for being at 0.3% though - even if it's only because he's one of the cheapest players in the game at 3.9 million pounds.
Finally, I have to give a shout out to team WhiteAlien, who, like Villa, sits bottom of the table. WhiteAlien has 252 points, a mere 550 POINTS?! behind the second to last place team, Chapel St Villans. That's...actually impressive. For some reason, WhiteAlien has decided to use the bold strategy of buying only the cheapest players available and leaving the rest of his money, 32.5 million pounds, in the bank. Interesting choice, but you'd have to say, WhiteAlien has mirrored Aston Villa's success this season better than anyone else in our league, so maybe he's the real winner? Good on him for sticking with Watford striker Fernando Forestieri, who actually now plays for Sheffield Wednesday.
Don't forget to let me know what you think the best team names are in the comment section below!