Nothing else matters

Aston Villa FC will be needing to shell out for major improvements to the club's infrastructure in the summer and I'm not talking about signings and contracts. The fans will need therapy after a dire season which has seen them pump cash into the club to watch Villa score 8 times at home.

After a promising start to the season, I've no idea how it ended up like this. The lines have blurred and I've come to expect less from this team with every passing game. I've no idea who to point fingers at, I've no idea who to blame. We've not got an assistant manager, we've not got a 'star' player, we've got no hope at staying up even though it should be in 'our hands'. Staying up now is a case of hoping QPR, Burnley and Leicester can be even worse than us, because Aston Villa can't do a thing should the spotlight fall on them.

Aston Villa's team is made up of players who have no right to get involved in a dogfight for survival and yet that is what the team has managed to plunge into. Then there's the fact it takes Villa months to even score. Then there's the fact that Villa can't even beat a relegation rival. Put those two together and you've got a recipe for relegation. Villa's only saving grace at this moment of time is that things are compact at the foot of the Premier League table.

There have been flashes of individual brilliance by some of Villa's better players this season, but that can't save a team that shows no chemistry on the pitch. Carles Gil has had to point at where he wants people to be moving to in the last two games. The positivity of a good performance is destroyed the next match with a terrible performance.

Then there's the problem of consistency, like I noted above. Every good game by Villa is followed by a bad game. The only stability shown by the team is the fact they can't score. Nothing else matters at this point other than the performances of the teams below us. Instead of watching Villa, you might be better served watching QPR or Burnley, because at least then you can revel in some schadenfreude.

I'd like to look back on this 'match report' with laughter next year, when we are hopefully a mid-table side. Right now, I'm going to eat myself to death and stare motionlessly at the night sky and try not to look forward to next week. Aston Villa have tortured the Premier League with some of the worst footballing displays of the past year and in doing so have provided the cure for insomnia.