Let's get this out of the way at the top here: Mark Cuban will not be buying Aston Villa. The billionaire owner of the NBA's Dallas Mavericks and Shark Tank star has been connected to the club overnight by a website that appears to have just entirely made up their story. Why anyone would do this right now is beyond me (though I and countless others are writing about it, so maybe that explains it), and I have no idea where it really started (though I have my suspicions).
But let's debunk this right away. Cuban had this to say on twitter when he was asked directly about buying the club.
@Dean_Avfc_Jones @brianstelter @DKThomp @CyberDustApp dont even know which team that is :)
— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) December 14, 2014
Alright, we can all go home now. This is a non-rumour that only served to make us woefully aware of how globally inconsequential Aston Villa have become. Whee.
Though it does put me in the mind of one of the great poetic lyrics in American songwriting:
"But she doesn't know who I am
And she doesn't give a damn about me."