Future Aston Villa injury report

The international break was not kind to Aston Villa as Ron Vlaar and Philippe Senderos both got injured. Considering Villa have already had quite a bit of injuries on the back line this season, this is less than ideal. And there are still a couple of days before the Southampton match, leaving plenty of time for the rest of the defense to get injured. Here are some predictions on some future Aston Villa defender (and anyone who can fill in as a defender) injuries.

• Nathan Baker: head injury, probably
• Matthew Lowton: injured by a Ciaran Clark tackle
• Aly Cissokho: concussion after an own goal bounces off his head in a training session
• Alan Hutton: injured by a Ciaran Clark tackle
• Enda Stevens: dies of a broken heart due to everyone forgetting of his existence
• Leandro Bacuna: runs into the goal post after being beaten by Jack Grealish in a training session
• Chris Herd: attacked by a kangaroo (Get it, you guys? He's Australian! What? Fine.)
• Ciaran Clark: injured by a Ciaran Clark tackle
• Jores Okore: gets sucked into another dimension, proving some scientists' hypotheses for the question "If a manager has a player, but never plays him, does he really exist?"
• Ron Vlaar: probably from like stretching or something stupid
• Philippe Senderos: run over by a truck
• Shay Given: gets stuck under a giant pile of money
• Brad Guzan: neck injury after putting his head in his hands too often
• Joe Bennett and Antonio Luna: despite  being out on loan, they are also injured by Ciaran Clark tackles