clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Aston Villa Take Over Bid: Just Send Us Your Bank Details

New, comments

Request for an urgent business relationship

Dear honored members of Aston Villa Football Club,

First, I must request your strictest confidence in this transaction. We are the top officials in the Qatar Investment Authority (QIA), and are interested in adding an English football club to our investment portfolio, to complement the French and Spanish sides that are slowly increasing our wealth. However, in order to avoid competition with others seeking to purchase such a storied piece of English football history, we must ask that you keep this matter confidential.

Having consulted with my colleagues at the QIA, I have the privilege to request your assistance in transferring £100,327,310 (One hundred million, three hundred twenty seven thousand, three hundred ten pounds) into your accounts, although we are willing to deposit an additional £5M (five million pounds) if Alan Hutton mysteriously disappears.

If you find this proposal acceptable, we shall require the following documents:

(a) your banker's name, telephone, account and fax numbers.

(b) your private telephone and fax numbers -for confidentiality and easy communication.

(c) your letter-headed paper stamped and signed.

Please note that this transaction is 100% safe and we hope to commence the transfer latest 7 (seven) banking days from the date of the receipt of the above listed documents. The business will take us 30 (thirty) working days to accomplish.

Please reply urgently.

Yours faithfully,

Ramy Ibrahim Al-Fayyad

***Why don't you follow 7500 to Holte on Twitter and like us on Facebook? Come on, you know you want more of us!***