Alan Hutton helps relegate club, has never been happier

Denis Doyle

Alan Hutton wants to leave Aston Villa and return to Spain. Perhaps Villa fans that bought shares in Real Oviedo could call in a favor.

Apparently Alan Hutton really enjoyed his half-season playing in La Liga, so much so that he would love to return for another year. The 29-year-old right back was finally free to let go of his troubles and just play football again, and it's been quite the boon for both his professional mindset and his family life. Hutton acknowledges that Scottish players* tend to be known for a lack of technical prowess, but feels confident that he wasn't at all out of his depth against some of the world's best sides.**

Look, I'm not going to keep pretending as though this is something I am prepared to take seriously. If Hutton is happy and his family is happy then I hope he manages to find a club and continues being happy. I'm sure he's a decent enough guy. But he has the self-awareness of a fence post and this entire article is hilarious.

*Alan Hutton.

**He really, really was.

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