Andy Marshall Brings the News: Darren Bent shocked at reception, more

Gabby is really scared of spiders.

I haven't been in for a while. There hasn't been too much news for me to write, but more importantly I've been taking part in some of the occupy protests. My local curry joint started a vegan section on its menu, and I wasn't having any of that. I mean, honestly, how many people are vegan? Maybe 1 in 100. Can't have that. I am the 99%.

But things seem to have evened out. I got them to add a cheeseburger to the menu. For every animal you don't touch, vegans, I'll eat three. While I play FIFA. On my leather couch.

Anyhow, to the news. In the first item of business, Darren Bent is delusional. Don't get me wrong, I love the guy and all, but anyone who thinks they could leave Sunderland like he did and not receive a terrible reception is nuts. Here's the good news, Darren. They may have been booing you, but you're making more money than all of them combined. That's why you came here, right?

Speaking of people who were disappointed with the trip to the Stadium of Light: Alex McLeish! Can't really blame him considering we had the match in the bag. The good news is that we left Steve Bruce equally frustrated. The Stadium of Light: now with enough frustration to be a Twilight novel!

Finally, I'd like to make note of the fact that there are more goals being allowed in the EPL this year than in any other save one. I would also like to point out that I am not playing. Coincidence? Almost certainly.

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